“To be clever enough to get all that money, one must be stupid enough to want it.”

“Christmas ain’t over ’til the fat angel sings”

“The Tassel is Worth the Hassle”

“Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so. ”

“The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources”

“It’s not enough to succeed. Others must fail. ”

“Life is Too Important to Take Seriously”

“You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions.”

“Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.”

“So, rather than appear foolish afterward, I renounce seeming clever now.”